A Joyful Reunion

   Blessed are they that mourn; for they shall be comforted (Matt. 5:4) 

      April 23, 2021, two years ago was my last view, last touch, and conversation with my husband. Though full of learning and unimagined blessings, this journey of grief is one I would joyfully exchange to have him with me again. But I must recognize God’s sovereignty, His plan, and the fact that he is now happier than ever. I know this because he had been preaching and longing for this reunion with our Maker. It may not be in a way he wanted his untimely passing to happen of being sick, but he would have preferred The  Rapture to take place, which we all, as Christians, wish for.

     I can only imagine my husband’s entry into the presence of God two years ago, and that while God is his center of attention, he also loved seeing his other loved ones who had gone ahead of him, his elder brother and father, my parents, my brother-in-law, his relatives and loved ones in the faith and our “son,” whom we named  “Brucelee” taken into heaven before he was ever born and to this very day, is serving the Lord joyfully and also waiting for me when my time here is over.

     One of the truths I love and is comforting is God’s promise that “God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away and he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. (Rev. 21: 4-5) and I am looking forward to this day too.

     My husband was my prayer partner and is still my silent prayer partner today, although in another way. He still speaks to everyone who knew him well enough here, through his life, and one day I will hear not just memories of his voice but his actual voice, more delightful than ever.

     For now, grief has become my companion and God’s anvil to work in my life. Nobody ever wanted to experience grief because it comes with loss and being uninvited. But it is His way to test and strengthen my faith. The deep pain in facing this fallen world without my husband isn’t just suffering for me to get beyond; it is suffering that is purposeful, achieving what’s of eternal value.

     I was not able to say goodbye to my husband because I was full of hope, but with the hope in Jesus Christ, his passing is not the end of our relationship but only a temporary interruption. The grand reunion awaits us, and I anticipate it and delight in imagining it with everything in me. God delivered my husband from his many struggles and suffering, and I believe there could have been more, but to know my darling to never suffer again for all eternity brings tears of joy.

     Although it is painful to think that he is not here anymore, when I feel that longing, I get outside, breathe, pray, and think of God’s promises.